“Talk dirty to me” flashed the message on the screen from my boyfriend. I had no idea how to turn a guy on over text…
My mouth went dry, my heart raced, my head spun, I felt my cheeks flush with red.
I had no idea what to say and the man of my dreams was about to find out I was *totally clueless* when talking dirty over text.
“Really like the shape of your penis, it’s great.” Was my reply.
Silence followed, a lengthy silence. It was a pathetic effort, and I knew it at the time.
He dumped me the next day. Fail. I was only 18 and lived to fight another day, and I think he’s in jail now anyway whereas I’m kicking corporate ass in New York. I used to love bad boys…no longer (ok, well maybe a tiny bit ;)).
I’ve since improved my text game a lot and now know exactly what texts to turn a guy on over text.
When it comes to how to turn a guy on over text, the basic principle is that you need to make him feel like a king, the boss, the mac daddy, big poppa, the original gangster, the man… or whatever choice ego inflating label you wish to give him…got that?
So, it’s a guy’s ego is your primary target when sending texts to turn a guy on. I’m a recognised psychological expert when sending texts like these. All my friends now come to me for advice on this subject. So listen up, here goes:
6 magic ways how to turn a guy on over text
1. Nude selfies and videos
This is the big way how to turn a guy on over text. If you already know about this, skip to 2 below for just the plain text examples.
“A picture says a thousand words” they say.
When it comes to turning a guy on, a picture says ten thousand words and more, it is the holy grail of texts to turn a guy on. Actually, the holy grail is now video.
Here are the secrets to how to turn a guy on over text with picture and video messages:
Leave a little to the imagination
Be classy. Full frontal nudity is fine if you’re super comfortable with your man. What will drive him crazy and put him under your spell is some class and style. Do not reveal too much.
Make sure you hair and makeup is set, your lingerie is good (Don’t know how? You cannot afford to miss this). Show just enough to set fire to his imagination. A rogue nipple, an overhead shot looking down of your face and cleavage, a hoisted stocking.
Try and frame your pictures as an artist would and use photo burst mode on your phone so you can select the best one.
Bluntly, no guy really wants to see a picture of your vagina in all it’s glory over text message. Don’t do it.
Use soft lighting
If you have a dimmer switch- use it.
Otherwise a bedside lamp angled towards a white wall will create soft and forgiving ambient light.
You must use soft lighting unless you are 100% comfortable with your figure.
Soft lighting adds an air of a sex, seduction and enhances the mysteriousness surrounding you – which guys absolutely love.
How to turn a guy on over text with a non-nude video clip
Here is a way to send a sexy picture without any nudity which will turn him on just as much as a nude. Send him a picture of you massaging your clit through your underwear.
Send this to him in the mid afternoon (not the morning) towards the end of the week. People’s minds and attentions are more likely to wander at this time.
Trust me, if you send this to him accompanied by the words:
“Thinking of you”
This will blow his mind and capture his heart. And the great part is you didn’t even get naked and risk having your photos and videos released to the internet. Speaking of which a word on safety…
The best video
Use this video technique if you really want to know how to turn a guy on over text. Film him and you having sex on your phone. Check the video to make sure you look great in the video. At a later time, send this video back to him. It requires a little bit of planning to make sure the phone is next to you during sex. I use this one all the time and have absolutely no problem pulling a guy back into my orbit, if I want to of course.
Use Snapchat where possible so the guy’s phone does not keep your images. What seems like love at the time you send a sexy photo of video can rapidly go sour and you do not want him to have access to hundreds of nudes of you that he might post on the internet or to your employer (yes, this does happen with alarming regularity). Be *ultra* careful.
OK, now for the fun part. The words.
2. “I’m so horny” or “I’m so wet”
Short but sweet, this is a classic that I use with devastating effect with guys.
Why is this good? Well it puts the ball in his court. You want a dominant man. If he doesn’t pick this up and run with it, you are too good for him. He should now take the initiative and reply with a list of dominant things he wants to do to you in the bedroom.
The other piece of genius in this is that it doesn’t expressly state that it is him you are thinking about in your state of extreme horniness. Communicating covertly is always better than overtly – right? Let him wonder whether you’re thinking about him or other guys. He’ll feel turned on and potentially a little jealous that the next hot guy you see you’ll sleep with. Keep him on his damn toes ladies.
If you really want a comprehensive lesson on how to talk dirty to guys, check this out.
3. The fake “mistake” text
Ok, if the last one was good. This is great. Text him this the morning after you’ve slept with him / the morning after you’ve dated him / the morning after you’ve kissed him for the first time:
“OMG, [Summer/Becky/Courtney] [his dick is so big/the sex was so good/he’s such a dominant kisser/he knew exactly what to do][delete as appropriate for the context]”
and then immediately follow up with,
“OMG OMG OMG NOT MEANT FOR U. SHIT! DAMN PHONE!” and then put like a million of those little emojis that look like they are having the life drained out of them as if you meant to send the message to your friend instead.
Note, the words you use should make it very clear you are specifically talking about him and not some other random guy.
Congratulations you made him feel like a boss without paying him a direct compliment. He now thinks you brag about him to your friends, which turns EVERY guy on. They want to feel like the sex god remember. He will want to believe it is true so don’t worry about your cover being blown.
When you are actually in bed with the guy (and not just over text). You should be using these killer questions to get an advantage.
4. “Tell me what you want to do me”
Again, with this one you’re putting it all back on him. It sets up the beautiful male/female dynamic of master/slave. You are his slave. You will submit to his every pleasure. It’s what he wants in his deepest core and this is the ultimate message you want to send to him how to turn a guy on over text.
Again, if he doesn’t reply to this with a long list of dominant power moves, you should move on. He had his chance.
5. “I just watched this ….[insert link to porn video]”
OK, now this is getting very serious and very cunning. Find your favourite porn video (ideally it should be a FFM threesome video for maximum sexual potency). Copy and paste the link into your chat window accompanied by “I just watched this”.
The great part is you don’t even need to watch the porn if you don’t feel like it. I have to say, this one works the best for me of all on this list. It’s also very original because guys tend to think girls are innocent little princesses that don’t watch porn at all. Haha. You want to fry his circuits? Use this.
6. Where did you learn [to dominate me like that/to fuck me like that/to tie me up like that]
This, again, is making him feel like the king. You should use it after a night of great sex. It implies he is experienced in bed (every man wants to feel like he is experienced in bed) and it implies you enjoyed it. Genius.
P.s. And if you really want to learn how to talk dirty to a man to keep him happy – learn here.